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The memory burns like a wildfire out of control. I still feel your hands on my shoulders. You squeezed me probably more than you wanted to. The memory of your gleaming wild eyes, burning through me like a lightning. You were different person in that moment; you didn't even see me. You saw someone else instead. You were mentally absent.

The memory of my feelings ..... I felt humiliated, I felt like you were forgetting everything we had before, all our relations were void in that specific moment. You hurt me ... it still hurts.

The memory burns. I try to hide it, I try to forget (as if I could!), I try to think of it as if it never happened. I can't. From time to time this memory comes back.

I understood you; I was just someone, who was at hand in that moment. And I was in your way. Your desires were somewhere else.

But, although I can't forget, I can forgive. That's the best I can do. And I do forgive you for saying those words.

Dylan, I AM more than a machine. I just hope you'll see me that way someday. I hope for it. I would do anything to make you see it. It would make me happier than you can imagine. I long for that moment with all my being.

Yes, I AM more than a machine. And sometimes when it comes to you ....... I am not objective.

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sam, the Roman

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sam, the Roman

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Life is a knife-fight in a dark alley; no holds barred, winner takes all.
Make sure you have a knife.
Tyr Anasazi, Chronicles of the Kodiak

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"TAG! You're it!"
Seamus Harper, 'And Miles To Go Before I Sleep.'

I opened this thread the exact same moment I opened the story at FF.N.

Anyways, I really love this take. I think that moment in Banks was one of my favorite for being infamous. I really wanted to hit Dylan. But of course, Rommie's much nicer than I am...

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-Full Harpy(since 2000 in my heart, but only 2001 on paper), Roman, and Gutterite(2002)
-Harpy Bed Maker
-Keeper of ZackAsh's Little Headaches, The MGS signs, and The Wagging Harper Tush
-My name's Harper's and I'm in Factions Anonymous as well as well as the Maru Ferderation's Expendable Extras Chief of Staff
-Honorary Tyrant, Bekance, Dylanite, Than Hegemonist, Magniac, TyRoman, MattJoe, Harpentines, Zackash, Wolfe Pack, Chinhead, Bekaneer, and Trancer.
-It's only cheating if you get caught.
-Why? Why? Because...Because I didn't like their stupid fish music, that's why!

It really is wonderful.

I have an idea.......

could you please mail me? its juergen.tetzner@freenet.de

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Roman
honorary Trancer and honorary Tyrant